India’s Iron Lady, Indira Gandhi, faced whispers of a amorous 12- time affair with M.O. Mathai, Jawaharlal Nehru’s trusted clerk. Detailed in Mathai’s banned 1978 bio remembrances of the Nehru Age, the reproach centres on a suppressed chapter named “ She, ” which allegedly exposed intimate secrets. Though unverified, it paints a picture of passion hidden behind her tough public facade.

Mathai’s Rise and Closeness to the Nehrus

His proximity to the prime minister’s family bred resentment from Indira Gandhi. In his book, Mathai described her as a “manly woman” with Cleopatra-like beauty but deep unhappiness, especially amid rumours of her husband Feroze Gandhi’s infidelities with figures like MP Tarakeshwari Sinha.

Sparks Fly: From Driving Lessons to Passion

Their alleged romance ignited in 1945 at the Nehru home. Mathai gave Indira driving lessons in a small Austin car postponed during her pregnancy with Sanjay Gandhi, whom he called “unwanted.” Drives turned confessional; Indira vented about Feroze, kissed Mathai on November 18, 1947, and pleaded, “I want to sleep with you.” They exchanged nicknames like “Bhupat” and “Putli,” travelling abroad incognito, including a thrilling Mont Blanc visit.

Intimate Revelations in the Missing Chapter

The withdrawn “She” chapter, styled like D.H. Lawrence, detailed explicit encounters. Mathai claimed on one of Indira’s birthdays, he tasted her breast milk and found it “unpleasant.” He praised her as blending “French women and Kerala Nair women” in bed proficient in prolonged kissing, posing seductively, yet not demanding frequent sex. Jealousy flared; she barred him from touch after he hugged a female friend. Indira allegedly confessed to hating Feroze’s touch and once suspected him of poisoning her milk.

End of the Affair and Lingering Shadows

The liaison reportedly ended in 1958 when Mathai caught Indira with yoga guru Dhirendra Brahmachari, her rumoured later lover. He returned her letters, calling her his “deadly enemy.” Rumours persisted of a pregnancy in her fifties, which ended via a secret abortion. Nehru likely knew, summoning her strategically. Biographer Katherine Frank and ex-ambassador B.K.